Let go of hurt and anger to get better health

Sometimes anger just feels so justified. You’ve been cut off in traffic. The wait person was rude. Maybe a friend made an uncaring remark. The hurt can happen in so many different ways. It’s not just limited to our everyday lives; it crops up in cultural and political conflicts as quickly as summer dandelions on a lawn.  The effects are not just the hurtful words or acts of violence we might experience but the fact that, when we hold anger or resentment inside us over long periods of time, it can create health problems.  

As the late Eldridge Cleaver observed, “You are either part of the problem or part of the solution.” And guess what? Being part of the solution could have a bonus effect: better health.

Mary Hayes Grieco, an author and the director of the Midwest Institute for Forgiveness Training, has taken this practice of forgiveness to the leading edge of research and understanding in this field. She states,”It’s about releasing the impact of a loss or a disappointment or an upset, releasing it from ourselves so we can go forward and not be continually reminded or triggered about this upsetting thing.”

Forgiveness is about our own  freedom. It doesn’t excuse another’s actions. The weight of carrying resentment or grudges or hatred is like trying to run a marathon carrying a sack of rocks. It doesn’t hurt the person that committed the offense it hurts the person who holds on to the grudge. The freedom of forgiveness is felt in what we are thinking first. Once that happens, relief from physical distress often follows.

The Mayo Clinic  reports forgiveness relieves stress and contributes to better heart health. Other studies found forgiveness is associated with lessening the need for medication, longer life and stronger immune systems.  

Practicing forgiveness and seeing its benefits is nothing new. Its included in many ancient and modern religious traditions. Its a practice Jesus demanded of his disciples and demonstrated himself. Jesus even called for forgiveness of those who crucified him. In his collected sayings that are commonly referred to as the Sermon on the Mount, he points out that  even before we go to worship God, we must forgive and be at peace with others.

Living stories of forgiveness walk among us, illustrating the power and progress each act of forgiveness brings. Consider Rep. John Lewis, a Congressman from Georgia. Harassed, beaten, and jailed during the civil rights movement, his faith and forgiveness has reached even those who attacked him. Lewis could have walked away and lived in bitterness, but he didn’t. He has dedicated his life to serving a greater good, even those who hated him. Interestingly, the forgiveness Lewis lived has extended beyond himself. A few years ago, one of Lewis’ attackers reached out to ask forgiveness of him. One act of forgiveness has blessed more. Watch the video for the whole story Man Asks Forgiveness of Rep. Lewis .